Monday, August 30, 2010

#185 The stay-at-home pastor's wife


There is an unwritten rule in Christian culture that pastor's wives do not work outside the home. Once married, most pastor's wives relinquish their vocation and set about the full-time business of wifedom. They are very earnest in their mission to be their husband's support, encourager, and Proverbs 31 vixen.

Most pastor's wives are indeed college educated (though often partially), having secured their husband by way of their university's Campus Crusade ministry. The rest of them met at Christian college where most everyone is looking to mate for life. If said wife does work outside the home after they are married, she will without question quit her job when they start having children. (And they will have more than one. You won't find a pastoral couple who has only one child. It does not exist in nature.)

The pastor's wife keeps extremely busy with her homeschool curriculum, coordinating the children's ministry at church and leading Beth Moore bible studies. But once the kids are grown and out of the house it is common for the pastor's wife to get her real estate license. This is an excellent business move, for from here she automatically becomes the real estate agent for every single person in the congregation.

This post originally appeared on Beliefnet. The original post and comment thread can be seen here.

20 comments:

Collin said...

Beth Moore Bible Studies HAHAHA

Ian "Buzzsaw" Barnes said...

real estate. bing.

AnnaRebecca said...

Proverbs 31 Vixen! Hehehe!

Anonymous said...

If she doesn't become a real estate agent then she's definitely selling Mary Kay!

Janey said...

You forgot the part about teaching piano lessons. That is an acceptable way to make a little extra money when the children are young. Good pastor's wives ALWAYS know how to play piano, of course.

(I'm currently trying to think of ANY pastor's family I know with only one child....let's see, # of kids of pastors I know:
4,2,3,2,4,3,3,3,2,3,2,2,2,2,2,2,3,2...) OH WAIT! STOP THE PRESSES! I just though of one! But it's a family where the WIFE is the pastor and they are now divorced. So maybe they don't count, what with their obvious shortcomings in the first place.....

jane
p.s. Just discovered your blog and LOVE it. I've been reading random posts, you'll probably see a few more comments....

stephy said...

They DO all play piano!

(The posts with zero or few comments all have big comment threads over on Beliefnet. When my contract was up all the comments couldn't be copied back over here, but if you search my blog on Beliefnet you can find them there.)

Lennyb said...

Oh man, when I was a youth pastor years ago my wife would get fun questions about her working and us not having kids. She's get a special ration of shit when she headed to Vegas with the girls (she's a bit of a sun worshiper and still goes a couple times a year).

Now, I am the lead/preaching/teaching/only pastor at a different church and have been for 3 years. My wife frequently reminds me that she isn't learning piano and isn't doing any solos! But she does pull rotations in the nursery ...

And, I just had to share this too. It fits into my "am I the only pastor who ..." category.

My 8 yr old son just got home from school and hands me his daily note from the teacher (he's in a special needs class, they all get daily notes). Apparently he decided to use the word "motherfucker" several times today (it's a fave of his birth father).

So, I got to wonder if I'm the only pastor today who held his son's face in his hands and said, "You are my son, and I love you even though you called the other kids motherfucker today".

Diggin' the blog(s)!

stephy said...

Lenny...this made my day.

Catty said...

When I was a kid our pastor's wife was the other pastor.

Thailand Real Estate said...

Some extra income is typically a good thing. With the potential money involved in real estate, however, I'm a little surprised pastor's wives don't get into the business sooner.

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When we teach ourselves and our children discipline, we are teaching them and ourselves how to suffer and also how to grow.

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Benjamin Lockwood said...

In short, being a wife of a pastor is really a stressful life a woman can have. I'm not against any pastor here or whatsoever, I just find it too stressful to be the wife of any pastor.

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Glenda Chastain said...

Every person should learn how to devote themselves into something they think would help them ease up their mind and focus into something. The yoga is one of such activities that could help you relax your body's muscles.

Tina said...

I love this. My dad is a youth pastor. My mom has worked as a full time nurse since I was born. She has actually received a lot of criticism for it. I honestly couldn't be more proud of her. I am so glad she isn't just a pastor's wife but has her own identity as well.

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DynaCom Management said...

Great post. The real estate market is great for those that are social people because the more people you know the more people that look to you for real estate advice.